Well dear reader, I have not managed to write many posts recently. I have been so busy, and yet done very little.
Yesterday I had a good excuse – we were all at a wedding, which was lovely. Our long time friend J married her fiance C at a beautiful local church with the reception in the building where our church meets. Everyone pitched in to decorate, with the snacks and puddings (main meal was catered) and of course with the celebrating. We caught up with old friends and enjoyed the band. It was a wonderful day, which I would have enjoyed a little more if our 3 year old was slightly calmer and would sit still for 2 minutes. Thank goodness D found the sand pit at the reception to keep him busy. Credit goes to N for the most amusing heckle of the service though, during the vows. It went like this…. “C, will you take J to be your lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, from this day forward as long as you both shall live, until death do you part” “I will”. “J, will you take……” “I will”. “And will you, their family and friends, support and uphold them in their marriage, now and in the years to come”. Everyone says “we will”. Except one small boy who cried out “noooooooooo”. So proud.
But I digress….
Today I have not really done anything, but yet I’ve been busy all day. I am only just getting 2 minutes to myself. I say to myself, but I’ve got the baby stirring next to me and he might demand my attention at any time, and I’m eating my first meal of the day at the same time as typing. So, what have I actually done?
Woke up at 7am as N ran into our room and got into our bed. Spent 30 minutes trying to protect S from N flopping about, and shouting “be careful of the baby” repeatedly before Darren finally got N in an armlock and they both went back to sleep. Breastfed S who had woken up when N hit him (by accident) across the head. Fell back to sleep.
8.30am briefly woke up as D’s alarm went off and he got up and got N up. Turned over, went back to sleep to the sounds of an annoyed toddler shouting “noooooo” as Darren wrestled with him to change his nappy.
Stirred at 9.20 as D and N left for church (D has band practise beforehand), than at 9.30 I woke up properly when my alarm went off. Got up and went to the bathroom, and immediately as I left the bed S started crying. Returned to bed asap and fed him – which took about 30 minutes as he was still sleepy and is a slow feeder.
10am got out of bed leaving S asleep in bed, ran downstairs and made a cup of tea and put the expressing kit on to sterilise. Back upstairs, washed my face and did my teeth and picked out my clothes for the day. S was awake again (horrible mummy left him alone for more than 2 minutes, a fit cause for screaming don’t you agree?). Got S up, changed his clothes and his nappy, which upset him again so sat down on the edge of the bed and fed him again. By this point it was 10.30 and I was due to leave for church at 10.40. Busted deadline once again. Then I expressed milk for the bank (oh the relief of emptying out the side S hadn’t fed from), got dressed, threw S into a sling and slapped some flip flops on, then got out the house about 30 minutes too late.
Arrived at church at 11.20 to find Darren singing in the worship band and N in his pushchair being looked after by Uncle J. S stayed asleep for the whole service, including when he was passed around a few ladies who were queuing for cuddles. No one believes he is a screamy monster in the evenings as he is such an angel when we take him out. Managed to sign a few cheques (I’m on the church’s finance committee) before N came out of sunday school. Also managed to give my number to a girl I only vaguely know – she is at home during the day too and we are going to meet up in the week for a bit of company.
After church we went to the park as N needs to burn off energy after sitting still all morning. As we stepped out of the door, S filled his nappy then woke up starving and screaming. Gah! Sat in the park feeding S as D chased N around for half an hour. It was a lovely sunny day and I enjoyed having 30 minutes to relax whilst watching my 2 of my 3 favourite boys playing happily together.
Around 1.30 we caught the bus home, much to N’s delight. In the door, and woke S up to change him then feed him. D made food for N who refused to eat it despite cajoling. As S finished feeding a Freecycler turned up to collect a bag of clothes, and I managed to throw in a load of washing. Then took over trying to persuade N to eat whilst D winded S. By 2.45 N had finally eaten some dinner and it was straight upstairs to bed for his afternoon nap. That involved lying down on the bed feeding S again whilst holding a bottle of milk for N. (Darren took a break from childcare to pop down to his office and do some work). N was determined to play cars and stay awake but I finally managed to get him to sleep after 20 minutes. As a bonus S was also asleep. I climbed out of bed and left them sleeping together whilst I quietly put the last load of clean clothes away. After that I ran the gauntlet of cutting N’s nails – something I can only do when he is asleep and even then he often wakes up crying or shouting “noooooo”. This time he was asleep deeply enough and I got all 10 nails on his hands. Phew.
A quick dash downstairs (aargh, leaving the toddler and baby unsupervised together – panic!) to zap a microwave meal and hang up the washing from earlier. Dashed upstairs again and picked up S to bring him downstairs with me – luckily he stayed asleep when I put him in his moses basket in the living room. Ate my food and started this post. Whilst composing it, S woke up and wanted feeding again, and I’ve ended up typing most of it one-handed. D has gone out for an hour of badminton and I am now stuck on the sofa under a lightly sleeping newborn watching a programme I am not interested in because I am unable to reach the remote.
In summary, today I have just about held the fort and kept the household ticking over, but I needed D to help for at least half the day. And the sum total of things achieved which will not need doing again tomorrow are these two items – I gave my mobile number to someone, and I handed a bag of clothes across the threshold.
How do single parents do it?! And how are we going to find time to move house? Time to call the grandparents I think….